Being a mother is one of the most challenging and rewarding roles a woman can have. It requires patience, love, and dedication to raise a child and provide them with the support and guidance they need to thrive. However, mothering becomes even more difficult when you are constantly compared to your own mother, especially if she was not a good mother.
In my case, my mother was actually a good mother. She was loving, supportive, and always there for me when I needed her. However, my husband did not have a good relationship with his mother, which has created a lot of tension in our own family dynamic. Whenever I try to parent our daughter in a way that feels natural to me, my husband gaslights me and criticizes me in front of our daughter. This not only undermines my authority as a parent but also causes our daughter to question my decisions and actions.
It is incredibly frustrating to feel like I am constantly being judged and criticized by my husband, especially when all I want is to be the best mother I can be for our daughter. I find myself second-guessing my parenting choices and feeling like I am walking on eggshells around my own family. I wish I could have the freedom to parent in a way that feels right to me, without constantly being compared to my husband's idea of what a mother should be.
I long for the days when I could go shopping with my daughter and do all the bonding activities that I used to do with my own mother. I miss the closeness and connection that I had with my mother, and I wish that I could have the same kind of relationship with my daughter. However, my husband's constant criticism and gaslighting make it difficult for me to truly connect with my daughter and be the mother that I want to be.
I often find myself wishing that I was a single parent so that I could parent in a way that feels right to me, without the constant judgment and criticism from my husband. I want to be able to speak to my daughter every day and show her the love and support that she deserves, without feeling like I am constantly being undermined by my husband. I want to be able to parent confidently and assertively, without feeling like I have to constantly defend my choices and actions.
Mothering is already a difficult and challenging role, but it becomes even harder when you are constantly compared to your own mother, especially if she was not a good mother.
My relationship with my daughter is suffering because of my husband's gaslighting and criticism, and I long for the freedom to parent in a way that feels right to me. I hope that one day I can break free from the constant comparisons and judgment and be the mother that I know I can be.
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